PARENTING – 14 Gospel Principles that can Radically Change Your Family by Paul David Tripp – This book sets forth fourteen practical and gospel-centred principles that help parents view their role through the lens of Gods grace, radically changing how they interact with their children.
When I became a mom, I knew it was important to read books and all but I also still thought parenting would just come “naturally”. I mean I gave birth to the child, I should know everything. Well, I’m glad to announce that I didn’t and I still don’t. And even though some parenting skills come naturally there is a need to polish, refine and fine-tune them. What I call – Continuous Parenting Training, learning and Development – CPTLD. You read that here first lol
I am in the final stage of reading this parenting Book and one thing is clear in my opinion – There is a difference when a Man writes a book and when a woman writes a book. Whew! This Book is very tough meat coated in wisdom and no mincing words at all. As expected, the Author was very direct and clear and wasn’t even afraid to get controversial with some of his opinions.
I loved that because it made me think and decide my own thoughts on certain issues. The 2nd principle wrecked me for days. I dropped it and refused to pick up the book until many days later. It made reflect in a deeply personal way. This is the points that hit me – God NEVER calls you to a task without giving you what you need to do it. He never sends you out without going with you. But at the end time I read this , I was feeling so in adequate, so Incapable of being a mom. I had just gotten a letter about my son from school regarding a certain area of his development. I was so scared and worried! What am I doing? What am I not doing ? I wondered.
So I wrestled with God, telling him that I really couldn’t see the grace he has given me. God being so kind, he helped me see it eventually. Thank God we have a high priest who is touched by the feelings of our infirmity.
The Book contains 14 Bible Based Principles that cut right at the heart of Parenting.
I particularly recommend this Book to African Parents both in Diaspora and at home because in many cases we are constantly seeking our identity from our Children. Our children are the yardstick of our success. We depend on them so much to the detriment of the child. We many times think whatever they do, every mistake they make is specifically targeted at embarrassing us or disgracing us when in actual fact they are just being children and children will make mistakes.
There is foolishness in their hearts and they don’t even know it so naturally they have tendencies to behave in ways that don’t align with the high values we set. For instance – That’s why my son wants to play with the tee in the WC or the teenager sneaks out of the house with Daddy’s car to attend a party at 2:00am in the night without thinking of the dangers attached!
This book helps parents re-evaluate their expectations about parenting and their children. We must take our identity from God and simply model God’s Love and grace to our children. God is the ultimate person that does the work inside of them. We honestly can’t. You toddler or even teenager didn’t wake up one morning and say “ oh I want to frustrate mummy” the poor child is just being a child! We need to give room for this childish tendencies and then guide them to how they should behave.
The principles in this book are:
Principle – Nothing is more important in your Life than being one of Gods tools to form a human Soul
Grace
Principle – God never calls you to a task without giving you what you need to do it. He never sends you out without going with you.
Law
Principle – Recognizing what you are unable to do is essential to good parenting
Identity
Principle – If you are not resting as a parent in your identity in Christ, you will look for Identity in your Children
Process
Principle – You must be committed as a parent to long receive parenting because change is a process and not an event
Lost
Principle – As a parent youngsters not dealing with just bad behaviour but a condition that causes bad behaviour
Authority
Principle – One of the Foundational heart issues in the Life of every child is authority. Teaching and modelling the protective beauty of authority is one of the foundations of good parenting
Foolishness
Principle – The foolishness inside your children is more dangerous to them than the temptation outside of them. Only God’s grace has the power to rescue fools
Character
Principle: Not all of the wrong your children do is a direct rebellion against authority. Much of the wrong is the result of a lack of Character
False Gods
Principle – You are parenting a worshipper so it’s important to remember that what rules your child’s heart will control his behaviour
Control –
Principle – The goal of parenting is not control of behaviour but rather a heart and life change
Rest
Principle – It does not only rest in God’s presence and grace that will make you a joyful and patient parent
Mercy
Principle – No parent gives Better than one who is convinced that he desperately needs himself
Available in Nigeria- N10,500.
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